I just have this image in my mind of Boris spewing all this shite to a load of elderly, wizzened, greying Torygraph readers which is met with positive grunts and 'Hear, hear's
- Tax cuts if you earn less than £80k to help nurses who earn £65k.
- No-deal Brexit (doesn't actually matter what he actually said or didn't say, they just heard 'No-deal' and applauded). Pass the port, Timothy.
- Withhold the £39billion divorce payment until we have a deal we're happy with. More applause and more brandy