Top things that prevent me from 'de-googling'.
Storage costs. I've no idea where to put or how much it would cost for photo/video/docs/email storage.
Email. Self hosting email is terrifying because email is a magic black box. What email service will still exist in X years. Moving email address is a ballache.
Some of the software is damn good. Especially Maps, including the privacy violating elements, which I've found useful on numerous occasions.
Yak Shaver in Chief
Sarcasm as a Service
Beer, Sport, Tech, Cycling, Dogs
Stream of inane drivel.
Some legacy microblogging.
Carrying bags of sand and what have you.